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Showing posts with the label bereavement

Of Anniversaries, Deaths, Guilt, Remorse, Glory, and Relationships Transcending Death

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  Today would have been the 54th anniversary for Carl  and me. Last year, I spent it in the cemetery with Carl, as I did the year before. This year I cannot because I am in Bandung, Indonesia, but perhaps that is just as well.  On our 51st, he was alive, but not well. Three weeks earlier, he had fallen, been xrayed, and found to be in the advanced stage of cancer of unknown primary , with liver, lungs, bones, and stomach completely riddled with cancer cells, blood clots in his lungs, and his bones throwing off cells to create hypercalcemia, the reason he had fallen. It was a difficult time. We were just coming out of the covid months. We brought our CHARGE Syndrome son CB who had been living in group homes for 20 years home when they were not careful with protection from covid. At the same time, our spina bifida daughter, who lives about 30 miles to the south of us, independently, with a county-provided part-time aide lost her caregiver to surgery and no one wanted to take over, given

Just Released: Audiobook Version of The Widower's Guide to a New Life (Romer)

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  Just released -- the audiobook for The Widower's Guide to a New Life by Joanna Romer. This book was a finalist for the Book of the Year Award. For more posts about Joanna and her books, click  HERE .  Sign up for the MSI Press LLC newsletter Follow MSI Press on  Twitter ,  Face Book , and  Instagram .   Interested in publishing with MSI Press LLC? Check out information on  how to submit a proposal . Planning on self-publishing and don't know where to start? Our  author au pair  services will mentor you through the process. Interested in receiving a free copy of this or any MSI Press LLC book  in exchange for  reviewing  a current or forthcoming MSI Press LLC book? Contact editor@msipress.com. Want an  author-signed copy  of this book? Purchase the book at 25% discount (use coupon code FF25) and concurrently send a written request to orders@msipress.com. Want to communicate with one of our authors? You can! Find their contact information on our  Authors' Pages .

Daily Excerpt: The Widower's Guide to a New Life (Romer) - Learning to Be Alone

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  Excerpt from The Widower's Guide to a New Life   by Joanna Romer - INTRODUCTION Learning to Be Alone When we lose a loved one—a friend or relative—our first reaction after the pain is usually atavistic: how will this affect me ? When we lose a spouse, however, no such reaction is possible. The grieving widower or widow soon becomes aware that this loss is catastrophic in a different way: it’s more like losing a part of oneself, one’s arms or legs. We keep waiting for that dear one to reappear, we want to claim her or him—until we realize this isn’t going to happen. We’re alone. Not only are we in pain but also we’re alone. For the widower, in particular, this can be quite a shock. Accustomed to having a “right hand” or equal partner always around, the newly bereaved man can be thrown into confusion. He has not realized his level of co-dependency. Suddenly, he’s facing life without his spouse in a thousand different ways, and he is devastated. What can you do when your be

Today's Fortune Cookie: paths past bereavement

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  Today's fortune cookie is associated with The Widower's Guide to a New Life  by Joanna Romer. Read more about this book and its author  HERE .  Get a paperback copy at  MSI Press webstore . If not on sale at the time, use code FF25 to get 25% discount. (Note: the code does not work on books that are already on sale att discounted prices.) Sign up for the MSI Press LLC newsletter Follow MSI Press on  Twitter ,  Face Book , and  Instagram .   Interested in publishing with MSI Press LLC? Check out information on  how to submit a proposal . Interested in receiving a free copy of this or any MSI Press LLC book  in exchange for  reviewing  a current or forthcoming MSI Press LLC book? Contact editor@msipress.com. Want an  author-signed copy  of this book? Purchase the book at 25% discount (use coupon code FF25) and concurrently send a written request to orders@msipress.com.  Want to communicate with one of our authors? You can! Find their contact information on our  Authors' Pag

Daily Excerpt: Widow: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in Your 2nd, 3rd, and 4th Years (Romer) - Exercise

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  Today's book excerpt comes from Joanna Romer's Widow: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in Your 2nd, 3rd, and 4th Years CHAPTER SIX Exercise Dare I bring up the obvious? There are few things as crucial to your state of mind as exercise. While it may have been easy to go the gym, run around the block, or swim at the neighborhood pool during your first year of widowhood, by Year Two it’s become a little harder. Why is that? Quite simply, when you’re in a state of extreme stress or depression, such as early widowhood, exercise acts as a tonic, giving an immediate boost. As your sense of wellbeing returns, the benefits of exercise aren’t so obvious. They are still there, however, and exercise is still vitally important. Even though we begin to feel a new sense of calm and acceptance waking up in the morning, that doesn’t mean we should loll around the house all day in our pajamas. Yes, certainly, once a week it’s great to take a day off, but during the week try to incorporate a little

Daily Excerpt: Widow: Survival Guide for the First Year (Romer) - Being Alone

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  Excerpt from Widow: A Survival Guide for the First Year --  CHAPTER ONE Being Alone When I was in my mid-20s, I worked at Cosmopolitan Magazine as an Assistant Editor. My tenure there was short (barely a year), but because my editor liked me I was able to secure freelance assignments in later years. Writing for Cosmo , I learned that almost any problem can be remedied with concentrated self-nurturing and a few well thought-out lists. And so, throughout the years, I was able to handle two divorces, three marriages, many job changes and the untimely deaths of both my parents (although this last occurrence required the help of a very nice therapist). When Jack, my beloved husband of 16 years, died at the age of 71, I was devastated. There were days in those first months when I really didn’t see what I had to live for. Other times, I believed that I too would soon leave this earth, and so I scampered around trying to get my affairs in order. If you are a recent widow, you’re pro

Daily Excerpt: A Widower's Guide to a New Life (Romer) - Self-esteem

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  excerpt from A Widower's Guide to a New Life (Romer) -  Self-Esteem What gives you self-esteem? Is it wearing a clean shirt and well-polished shoes when you’re heading out to dinner with a friend, whether male or female? Is it the knowledge that you can still be useful as you fix your neighbor’s lawn mower, or maybe even her computer?  Is it the fact that the woman in the grocery store smiled at you when you let her go ahead of you in line, or the realization that you can still beat your old pal Phil on the tennis court after 31 years? All of these things (and more) can contribute to self-esteem, a very useful commodity for a widower to have. Chances are, if you’ve lost your wife recently, your self-esteem has taken a beating. When our typical routine is drastically altered and we find ourselves struggling with everyday events, one of the first things to plummet is our opinion of ourselves. That good opinion, that high self-regard, is very important in the process of healing. Mo

Cancer Diary: MSI Press Books on Bereavement

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  With cancer, it does happen. Many stories do not have happy endings, and some endings come sooner than we would like. MSI Press has published several books on bereavement. Broader in scope than the experiences of those who have lost loved ones to cancer, they share many, if not most, of the emotions of those who have grieve for those medical science could not save -- and they give hope and a wide range of options of how to go on and LIVE.  Harnessing the Power of Grief (Julie Potter) get the book or ebook In this book, Julie Potter traces back decades the research on understanding and coping with grief, which she describes as a natural human response to loss. Pulling from the work of Worden, the author prescribes four tasks for those in grief to use in managing their grief. She also walks the reader through special situations like tragic loss without warning. A book for those who are grieving and those who are walking with grievers. Read more posts about Julie and her book HERE . Lif