MSI Press Blog

  Strong emotions can feel like tidal waves — powerful, unpredictable, and overwhelming. Anger might feel dangerous. Grief might feel endless. Vulnerability might feel like weakness. So people clamp down on their feelings to stay functional. They believe that if they let the dam crack, the whole structure will collapse. But the truth is, the dam itself is what keeps them trapped. 1. The Myth of Control Many people grow up believing that emotional control equals strength. They learn that composure earns respect, while visible emotion invites judgment. Over time, they confuse containment with competence — thinking that if they can just stay calm, they’ll stay safe. Yet control is often fear in disguise. It’s the body’s way of saying, “I can’t afford to fall apart.” 2. The Body Keeps the Silence When feelings are suppressed, they don’t disappear — they migrate. They show up as tension, fatigue, irritability, or numbness. The body becomes the vault for everything the mind refuses to ...

Some people aren’t hiding their emotions—they genuinely can’t identify them. This can happen when: life moves too fast stress is chronic trauma has taught the brain to numb out emotions were never modeled or named in childhood When the emotional dashboard is blurry, ignoring feelings becomes the default simply because clarity is missing. Emotional Blind Spots Emotional awareness isn’t automatic; it’s learned. If no one ever said, “That’s sadness,” or “That’s frustration,” the body still feels those sensations—but the mind doesn’t have labels for them. Without language, emotions remain vague physical experiences: tight chest, heavy stomach, restless energy. People may call it “stress” or “tiredness,” but underneath is unrecognized emotion. The Speed Trap Modern life encourages emotional speed. We move from task to task, message to message, without pause. Feelings require stillness to surface. When every moment is filled, the subtle signals of emotion—breath changes, muscle tension, shif...

  Avoiding Conflict or Rejection Emotions—especially uncomfortable ones—can disrupt harmony. People who value peace or fear aban donment often hide their feelings to avoid: arguments disapproval disappointing someone being misunderstood Silence becomes a shield. But shields are heavy, and carrying them long-term takes a toll. When we suppress emotion, we trade short-term calm for long-term strain. The body still feels what the voice refuses to say. Tension builds, relationships flatten, and authenticity erodes. What was meant to preserve peace ends up creating distance. Hidden feelings don’t disappear; they wait. They surface later as fatigue, resentment, or withdrawal. The very harmony we tried to protect begins to fracture under the weight of what’s unsaid. True peace doesn’t come from silence—it comes from safe honesty . When we express feelings respectfully, we invite understanding instead of conflict. When we trust others with our truth, we give them the chance to meet us with...

  Recently, Learning to Feel (Girrell), reached #196 on the Amazon bestseller list of psychologist biographies. Book Description:  Learning to Feel, Second Edition, teaches readers how to gain choice and authority over their emotional states. Feelings and emotions are reactions to the deeply held beliefs and experiences of our lives. In order to become fully emotionally intelligent - that is, to be able to know what is yours, what comes from the others, and how best to respond to those others - we must connect first to those core experiences and often re-interpret the meaning they have held for us. Learning to Feel is such a journey, intended to be a set of trail blazes for anyone who wishes to up their game in the realm of emotional intelligence. (Edition 1 was selected for the Independent Press Distinguished Favorite Award and a Literary Titan gold award.) First Edition Book Awards Literary Titan Gold Award Independent Press Award Distinguished Favorite/Psychology For more ...