MSI Press Blog

from  Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over Forty  (Romer)   Feeling Abandoned   There you are, facing your first Christmas alone—ever. You’ve always had someone around at the holidays—first your parents and siblings, later on your spouse and your own children—but this year, things are different. Your wife left you in August and you haven’t really had the heart to hook up with anyone else yet. Both your parents are long gone and your only sister lives 3,000 miles away, with her own family to take care of. What should you do? There’s a big part of you right now that feels like a motherless child, totally abandoned. Maybe you feel rejected, unattractive, or unworthy of love. These are all feelings that society places on people who are the “victims” of divorce, and they have nothing to do with who you really are. This is not a place where you want to remain for very long. Once you erase the perception of yourself as being abandoned by your ex-spouse, a lot...

  from  Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over Forty  (Romer)   DAVID “DOC” ROBERTS                       “The door is always open. Every day is a new venture.”                               One of the kindest people I know is a tall, good-looking man who answers to the name of “Doc” Roberts. Doc has an easy-going way about him that reassures people, but he’s come by his composure through a long road of struggle. A veteran of three divorces, 58-year old Doc now focuses his efforts on helping other people get through life. His first marriage lasted only nine months. “I had just gotten out of the service,” he told me, “and nobody would hire me because of my disabilities [from the service]. I finally got into selling clothing.” Doc said his marriage to Debbie was pretty much based...

  As editor, I will have to tell the author's story of Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over Forty -- or at least as much of it as I knew about -- since the author, Joanna Romer passed away a few years ago, in the middle of writing her tenth book. Joanna had written several other books prior to Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles Over Forty, include the award-winning books, Widow and The Widower's Guide to as New Life! These books were based on her experiences after her husband, Milton, director of Stand by Me , died and prompted by them.  While she had not been divorced, being a widow had some of the same circumstances as being a divorcee, especially some of the same emotions and insecurities -- ones that she share with other women in similar circumstances. She wrote to help shape her own thinking and emotional understanding; she wrote even more so to help other women in the same cirumstances. Joanna's books have always been popular, even after her death. I...

  from Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over Forty (Romer) The Break-U p   “I want a divorce.” If you cringe when you read these words, chances are you’ve heard them yourself. Or maybe you’ve uttered them—initiating a divorce is almost as bad as being the victim of one. Well, not quite. Having been in both situations, I can attest that it is far more painful to be the one who is left. Feeling lost, betrayed or abandoned is a typical reaction for the marriage partner who has been told that he or she is no longer necessary for whatever reason.  We cry, we sulk, we wonder what we did wrong. Often there is confusion and unanswered questions—is he really leaving today ? Is there another woman (or man), or isn’t there? That person whom we thought we knew, the one who is now in the process of walking out the door, isn’t telling us everything because—well, the truth hurts. At this difficult juncture, our soon-to-be ex-spouse may be trying to spare our feelings by le...