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Of Anniversaries, Deaths, Guilt, Remorse, Glory, and Relationships Transcending Death

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  Today would have been the 54th anniversary for Carl  and me. Last year, I spent it in the cemetery with Carl, as I did the year before. This year I cannot because I am in Bandung, Indonesia, but perhaps that is just as well.  On our 51st, he was alive, but not well. Three weeks earlier, he had fallen, been xrayed, and found to be in the advanced stage of cancer of unknown primary , with liver, lungs, bones, and stomach completely riddled with cancer cells, blood clots in his lungs, and his bones throwing off cells to create hypercalcemia, the reason he had fallen. It was a difficult time. We were just coming out of the covid months. We brought our CHARGE Syndrome son CB who had been living in group homes for 20 years home when they were not careful with protection from covid. At the same time, our spina bifida daughter, who lives about 30 miles to the south of us, independently, with a county-provided part-time aide lost her caregiver to surgery and no one wanted to take over, given

Daily Excerpt: How to Get Happy and Stay That Way (Romer): Don't Let Guilt Block Your Happiness

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  Excerpt from  How to Get Happy and Stay That Way: Practice Techniques for Putting Joy into Your Life ebook: Anazon Kindle paperback:  MSI Press webstore  (code FF25 gives 25% discount) Don't Let Guilt Block Your Happiness It’s odd to think that guilt can get in the way of happiness, but I know it can because it’s happened to me. There have been times I’ve been so happy that tears come to my eyes—and then I realize something else has gotten into my head, too. That something else is guilt—guilt because I’m happy and other people aren’t. There is no way to get around this reality: not everyone is happy. In fact, there are those who say we should never declare ourselves happy while there are people in the world who are suffering. Some individuals—writers, philosophers—proclaim that to be happy in the world as we know it is a sign of insanity. I don’t agree with either of these concepts. To me, we are most apt to go out of our way to help those less fortunate than ourselves when we ar