Excerpt from Understanding the Challenge of "No" for Children with Autism (McNeil): No Cookies - Dennis

Dennis

Standing in the kitchen, cabinet door open, Dennis and Dad are seeking a snack. “Well, Dennis, it looks like we need to make a trip to the store soon. We are out of your favorite items.”

Holding his picture communication support device, Dennis requests cookies. 

Dad shows Dennis a bag of crackers and a granola bar, “No cookies, how about one of these?” Dennis repeats his request for cookies and Dad replies, “No. No cookies.”

A typical snack time in Dennis’ house is usually pretty casual. Dennis may receive a package of whatever snack he wants as long as he uses his communication device to make the request. Following his training and routine, Dennis persists with his request for cookies, creating a picture sentence, “I want cookie, please.”

Dad answers more firmly, “No cookies.” 

Feeling confused and reprimanded, Dennis becomes agitated, screams out and stomps his foot. 

Opening the cupboard wider, Dad encourages Dennis to look inside, “Look Dennis, we have NO cookies.” 

            Once Dennis inspects the cupboard and can’t find cookies, he looks back at the pictures in his communication device and requests fish crackers. 

            Dad sighs and says, “sorry buddy, no fish crackers.” Again, Dennis is confused by his dad’s refusal and reiterates his request for fish crackers. 

            “No fish crackers,” replies Dad, holding up raisins and a pack of nuts, “How about one of these?”

            Dennis begins to whine and twist his body, threatening to tantrum. Dad once again opens the cupboard wider and picks Dennis up to see all the shelves, “Look, NO fish crackers.”

            Looking carefully around the cupboard, Dennis concedes that the fish crackers are missing. Scanning the pictures in his communication device, he next requests fruit snacks. 

            Dad is relieved to see a box of fruit snacks and pulls it off the shelf. As he reaches into the box, Dad’s stomach tightens and a slight queasiness stirs. Desperately peering inside, Dad is hopeful that his eyes will find what his hand could not. Enveloped in disappointment, Dad’s voice is compassionate, “Oh no buddy, the box is empty. No fruit snacks.” 

            Hearing, “No,” while looking at the box in his dad’s hand launches Dennis into

emotional tumult. He drops his communication device, screams with fury, and striking his dad, grabs for the box. 

            Permitting Dennis to snatch the empty box, Dad sympathizes, “I know, I know. I’m frustrated, too. The box is empty. There are NO fruit snacks!” 

            Unable to find a pack of fruit snacks in the box, Dennis drops to the floor and cries. 

            After giving Dennis a few minutes to cry-it-out, Dad engages Dennis one last time. Wishing to pacify Dennis and provide him an agreeable treat without further emotional outbursts, Dad takes away Dennis’ communication device and, lifting him once more, encourages Dennis to make a choice, “What do you want?” 

Dennis looks around, considers his options, then picks a package of cheese and crackers. Dad takes a package for himself and two boxes of juice. The pair enjoy their snack together. 

Read more in Understanding the Challenge of "No" for Children with Autism by Colette McNeil -- how to break down the cookie scenario, how to manage these kinds of episodes, and much more. 

For more posts of Colette and her books, click HERE