Daily Excerpt: Living in Blue Sky Mind (Diedrichs) - How We Talk
.jpg)
excerpt from Living in Blue Sky Mind
I remember a time that I lied to my mother and how it made me feel. One
night my brother and I had a plan. We were going to throw a water balloon out
of our bedroom window against the wall of the house next door. After lights
went out and we got into bed, I snuck into the bathroom and filled a balloon
with water. I came back, and my brother lifted the screen to our window. I
leaned out as far as I could and threw the balloon. It was lopsided and
slippery so it flew off target. I heard a window break. My brother and I dove
into our beds. I saw that the shade on our window was up so I stood to pull it down.
When I was in the window, the porch light from the house next door came on. Our
neighbor stepped out and saw me. I fell on my pillow. She already saw me so I
got on my knees and looked out, acting groggy, as if I had just woken up.
Someone broke our window,” our neighbor said. “Did you see anything?”
I thought for a second. “I think I heard voices. I think I heard Slugger
Nyberg,” I said. Slugger was a bully on our block who was always getting into
trouble. I thought she would believe that.
Our neighbor looked at me for a little while, then shook her head, went
back in her house, and closed the door. Her porch light went off. Kneeling in
the window, I noticed that the light was still on in our room. I turned, and my
mother stood by my bed.
“What happened?” she said.
“Someone broke the window next door.”
“Someone?” my mother said.
“I think it was Slugger Nyberg. I think I heard his voice out there.” I
looked down at my pillow and saw water drops on it. I lowered myself onto the
pillow.
My mother put her hands on her hips. “Did you guys break the
window?”
I looked over at my brother, who was under his covers, huddled up, as if
he had slept through the whole thing.
“Mom, I told you. It was Slugger Nyberg.”
She stared at me with a tired, disappointed look on her face. “Go to
sleep,” she said. “We’ll talk about this in the morning with your father.” She
left; and our room went dark.
I lay in bed for a long time, feeling awful. I had never lied to my
mother before, at least not right to her face. Nothing was ever said again
about the broken window, and things went on like it had never happened.
I never forgot about lying to my mother. I still carry that little shard
of pain and regret in my heart all these years later.
Buddha talked about speech as part
of his Eightfold Path. When we talk about Buddha’s Eightfold Path, eightfold
means eight. It does not mean that we fold something such as a piece of paper
eight times. It just means eight. Buddha’s path has eight parts. We do not
consider them steps because they do not necessarily go in any order.
Buddha introduced Right Speech at the beginning of his Eightfold Path. Right
does not mean right not wrong, good not bad. It means the most ideal thing we
can do in the moment, the most skillful, harmonious, and complete thing. Buddha
talked about Right Speech because it is something we all do. We talk to our
family, friends, other people, our dogs and cats and fish and birds, even to
ourselves. We talk to give people information and to ask them questions. Our
talk means something. We can make ourselves and the people around us happy or
sad by the way we talk. We can make the people around like us or hate us by
what we say and the way we say it.
Buddha talked mainly about the things we do that make us unhappy and how
we can stop and start doing things that make us happy. With regard to speech,
Buddha said that we do not lie. We tell the truth. Buddha said that we never
lie for any reason. Sometimes, we find that hard. It seems easier sometimes to
tell a lie if we are going to get into trouble (as I did to my mother) or even
if we think telling the truth will hurt someone’s feelings. We might find it impossible
to tell the truth all the time. We might think it takes courage. Buddha said
that we always tell the truth.
When we practice Right Speech, we do not say mean, nasty, or hurtful
things. We do not talk about other people. We do not put people down. We do not
say things that make us feel big while making other people feel small.
We all know how it feels when we lie or speak rudely to or about
someone. Somewhere inside we know that feeling even if we act like we don’t
know or tell ourselves that we don’t know. It feels terrible. Buddha meant
exactly that feeling when he talked about suffering. Our hurtful, mindless
speech causes the people around us to suffer.
Reflecting
Why did Buddha make Right Speech a part of his Eightfold Path?
What difference does it make how we talk?
Think about a time you told a lie. How did that feel? What happened as a
result of your lie?
What do you think the world would be like if no one ever lied?
What do you think your world would be like if you never lied?
For more posts about Richard and his book, click HERE.
25% discount on paperback with code FF25 at www.msipress.com/shop
Comments
Post a Comment