Daily Excerpt: How to Stay Calm in Chaos (Gentile) - Sunday, Stay Present

 

 

excerpt from How to Stay Calm in Chaos by Julie Gentile

Sunday

Stay Present

At the beginning of a new week, ask yourself, how will you stay present this week? Will you notice tightness in your shoulders or a deep sigh out through your mouth as you exhale? 

Paying attention to these little details is an example of staying present. I notice them in me, too. Weekdays blending into weekends, soaring stress levels, anxious thoughts, feeling overwhelmed, scrutinizing every sneeze and sniffle, washing your hands more than you ever have, and going through multiple bottles of hand sanitizer would have anyone’s thoughts spinning. I’m living it, too. There have been a few nights where it took me hours to fall asleep (which hasn’t happened since becoming a mom, until now) because there is too much for my mind to process all at once.  

A week before the stay-at-home mandate began where I live, I was driving to and from work, dropping off and picking up kids from multiple schools and activities, and going to stores, the library, and yoga classes to teach and take. Then everything came to a halt.

Just like that, everything was different.

Just like that, my house transformed into a yoga studio, office, school, playground, gym, restaurant, and library.

Just like that, I merged every part (and some new parts) of my life into the same moment, including my roles as mother, yoga teacher, author, blogger, and now homeschooler.

 Working moms bear a big burden of the workload. As a full-time working mom with a preschooler and a kindergartner who have numerous remote e-learning assignments and virtual classes every week, my days are the busiest they’ve ever been. I oversee who needs to log in when, while balancing everything else I do every day. Because they’re still so little, my kids need constant oversight and help with everything—whether it’s logging in to a virtual class, clicking on a mouse, printing worksheets, handwriting, spelling, doing arts and crafts projects, or making lunch. I have my agenda, and they each have their own. This is the life of a working mom (or at least this one) during a modern-day crisis.  

 Add to that, the amount of emails and messages I have received in the last couple of months are close to the number of emails I usually receive in a year. The flurry of messages and alerts are a major distraction from the present moment, a.k.a. what I need to focus on. To stay present, the answer isn’t to check more emails and respond to more messages, it’s to do less. Doing less will help you stay present.

Staying present is giving attention to the task at hand so that you can concentrate on one thing at a time. For example, if you decide one morning to make breakfast for yourself or your family, you can stay present by being mindful of every step of the cooking process instead of also checking the latest headlines and the weather while writing your grocery list and folding laundry.

Be in the moment because that is the only place life exists. You love in the moment, think in the moment, communicate in the moment, feel in the moment. Let yourself truly be in the moment. When you can stay present, you have a better chance of finding the gift, joy, and meaning in every moment.

This moment in history is being called The Great Pause. Even the name is a reminder to pause to stay present. One of the ways I take time to pause and stay present every day is with meditation—an ultimate example of pausing from the whirlwind swirling around you. Meditation beckons you to stay present, giving your mind and body a chance to rest, recharge, and refresh. Many of us are wired to do more and more. We’re really good at accomplishing, striving, and achieving, but what about being? Meditation helps us to be still. During meditation, thoughts will come up as they always do, but you can observe those thoughts and let them go without attachments or judgements.

There are several types of meditation: mindfulness, Metta (Loving-Kindness), guided visualization, mantra, and many more. I cover several meditations in my book 108 Yoga and Self-Care Practices for Busy Mamas (MSI Press, LLC, 2019). Below is an in-the-moment meditation to get you started and to help you stay present. 

Let this meditation be a reminder that you are human. You are alive. You are here now. That is all that matters.

 

Self-Care Practice: “I Am Here Now” Meditation

Read the description below before you begin. When you’re ready, close your eyes.

Start in a comfortable seated position. Allow your spine to be tall and long, roll your shoulders up back and down, and stack your head over your heart. Settle in.

Begin by observing the quality, depth, and texture of your breath. Notice its fluidity. Become aware of the temperature of your breath as it comes in through the nose and as it exits the nose.  

To start the meditation, think of the words “I am here now.” Soak them up. Let them leave a gentle imprint on your mind. Every time you in inhale, think of or say the words “I am,” and every time you exhale, think of or say the words “here now.”

 Breathe in: I am

Breathe out: here now

I am here now.

 Can you stay in this moment? Can you truly be here now?

After a few moments, let the mantra start to fade, and open your eyes.

 Bonus Tip: Record yourself saying the words in this meditation and play it back when you need to remember to pause and stay present.

How to Stay Calm in Chaos earned honorable mention
in the Kops-Fetherling International Book Awards mind/body/spirit category

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