Daily Excerpt: How to Stay Calm in Chaos (Gentile)

excerpt from How to Stay Calm in Chaos by Julie Gentile

Wednesday

Stay Realistic

You’ve reached the point of the week. Do you have realistic expectations for how your day and the rest of the week will go?

As a recovering perfectionist, there are still some days I think I can get more things done than I realistically can. I accept that. Although my schedule can be unpredictable and I usually want to resolve everything I can as quickly as I can, I’m learning to be more realistic and to give myself grace when the things I think should get done don’t.

You can’t expect yourself to do it all, even if you think you should, so please don’t hold yourself to your pre-crisis standards. Accept what you can do today and let that be enough. The least important to-dos will have to wait. Like me, you’re likely not able to accomplish things in the way you’re used to, so be a rebel and set your own standards and boundaries.

To stay realistic, I anticipate a few things:

· I anticipate a range of interruptions throughout the day, including, “I’m hungry” (10 minutes after eating a large lunch); “I’m bored”; “I’m still hungry” (after the snack that was given after that same lunch); “I broke this rubber band”; “Can you fix this toy?”; “Can you turn on the light?”; and “The computer shut off” (one minute after logging in to a virtual class that we were early to and then 10 minutes late to because the computer had to reboot and I had to dig up the link again from the hundreds of other links and messages we have received). These are all real things that have been said to me by my 6-year-old over the last few weeks, by the way.

· I anticipate there will be some level of whining, crying, or outbursts after screens are shut off.

· I anticipate that I will not be doing spring cleaning this year. Sure, some things will usually get done, like the everyday wiping of the counters, picking up of crumbs on the floor that could add up to an entire meal and picking up of the puzzle pieces and crayons sprinkled everywhere that I often trip over. Still, I won’t be organizing my closet or drawers or going through the stacks of papers on my counter today or tomorrow or next week. These will have to wait for now. I’m doing what I can.

I also anticipate that I will rely on my self-care practices, especially journaling, to help me get through every day. Journaling is one of my favorite creative outlets and ways to practice self-care. If you’ve never tried journaling, now is the time. You don’t need anything fancy—just something to write on (or type on), something to write with, and some quiet time to reflect.

I journal every night as part of my bedtime routine. Sometimes it’s a page. Sometimes it’s 10 pages. Journaling helps me sift through and organize thoughts and feelings from the day. There are many ways to journal, including writing based on journaling prompts. I share one below to get you started.

Self-Care Practice: Write About the Crisis Version of You

Find a quiet spot to think about your experience of the crisis—think about how you have responded to it and what has changed in your life because of it.

Below are some questions to get you started:

· What emotions best describe how you feel right now?

· What has a crisis taught you about how you handle these situations?

· What have you learned about living in a state of unknown?

· How did you make a positive difference today?

· How did you make yourself proud today?

· How will this reflection help you to continue to stay realistic?

Bonus Tip: Keep your journaling going. Carve out space for it every day. To help you stay inspired, check out my book 108 Yoga and Self-Care Practices for Busy Mamas (MSI Press, LLC, 2019), which is packed with journaling prompts. You can even use colorful pens to express emotions or differentiate your days when you journal.

How to Stay Calm in Chaos earned honorable mention
in the Kops-Fetherling International Book Awards mind/body/spirit category

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