When Leaders Cross Cultures: A Story About Which Values Bend—and Which Refuse

 

Leaders rarely realize how many of their values are cultural until they leave home. They step into a new environment believing they are bringing “universal” principles, only to discover that universality is a myth. What happens next—what bends (transforming values, in Alanazi & Leaver's terminology), what holds (conforming [to the first culture] values in Alanazi & Leaver's terminology—reveals more about the leader’s inner architecture than any résumé ever could.

Here are three short narratives that show how this plays out.

1. The American in Dubai: Learning to Slow Down Without Losing Purpose

When Mark arrived in Dubai to lead a regional project team, he carried the classic American toolkit: direct communication, quick decisions, and a belief that transparency was always the highest virtue. He assumed these were leadership values. In reality, they were cultural habits.

He learned this the hard way.

In his first month, he pushed for rapid timelines and blunt feedback. His team complied politely, then quietly stalled. Meetings felt warm but unproductive. Decisions dissolved after the fact. He thought people were avoiding accountability; they thought he was disrespecting relationships.

The shift came when a senior Emirati colleague told him, gently, “You are trying to lead before you have earned the righgt to be heard.”

Mark slowed down. He invested in hospitality, in conversation, in the long prelude before the point. He learned to read indirect signals. He stopped demanding immediate answers.

But he did not change everything. He held onto his belief in fairness and meritocracy. He refused to privilege connections over competence, even when the system nudged him in that direction. That value was identity‑anchored. To abandon it would have felt like self‑betrayal.

He adapted the expression of leadership, not the core of it.

2. The Lebanese Manager in Nairobi: Rethinking Hierarchy Without Losing Honor

Maha grew up in a culture where hierarchy was clear, roles were defined, and leadership carried a certain ceremonial dignity. When she moved to Nairobi to run a logistics operation, she expected her authority to be recognized automatically.

It wasn’t.

Her Kenyan team valued collaboration and informality. They expected leaders to be accessible, not elevated. They wanted to challenge ideas without challenging the person. Maha felt exposed, even disrespected. She interpreted informality as a lack of seriousness; they interpreted her formality as distance.

She adapted slowly. She began inviting debate. She let people call her by her first name. She learned to laugh in meetings. She discovered that authority could be relational rather than positional.

But she held onto one thing: honor. She would not tolerate public humiliation—of herself or anyone else. When a visiting executive criticized a junior employee in front of the group, she intervened immediately. That boundary was non‑negotiable. It came from a deep cultural and personal place.

Her leadership became a hybrid: collaborative on the surface, honor‑based at the core.

3. The Russian Engineer in Silicon Valley: Softening Hierarchy Without Losing Loyalty

When Sergei joined a tech firm in California, he was startled by the casualness. Engineers challenged managers openly. Interns questioned architectural decisions. People said “no” to their bosses without apology.

In his world, hierarchy protected order. Loyalty flowed upward and downward. Leaders were expected to be decisive, not endlessly consultative.

At first, he saw the American style as chaos. But he also saw its power: innovation moved faster when ideas weren’t filtered through rank. He began inviting dissent. He learned to say, “What do you think?” instead of “Here is what we will do.”

Yet one value refused to budge: loyalty. When a colleague publicly blamed a team member for a failed sprint, Sergei bristled. In his view, leaders protected their people. They absorbed blame and redistributed credit. That value was not cultural decoration—it was moral identity.

He adapted to egalitarianism, but he kept loyalty as his compass.

What These Stories Reveal

Across all three narratives, the same pattern emerges:

Values that change

• communication style

• pace

• hierarchy expectations

• decision‑making rituals

• conflict expression

These are behavioral values—tools, not identity.

Values that resist change

• fairness

• honor

• dignity

• loyalty

• moral boundaries

• personal integrity

These are identity‑anchored values. Leaders protect them even when the environment pushes hard.

And the determining factor

Leaders change values when adaptation feels like competence. These values can be called transforming values.

They refuse to change when adaptation feels like self‑erasure. These values can be called conforming values; they are chained to the original culture and original self-perception.)

post inspired by the article, "Transforming Values and Conforming Values of Arab and U.S. Leaders: An Exploratory Study in Cultural Relativism" (Mowafiq Alanazi and Betty Lou Leaver) on LREC in the Military (West Point Press)

Book Description

In today’s complex global security environment, military effectiveness depends not only on advanced technology and tactics but also on the ability to understand, communicate, and collaborate across cultures. This interdisciplinary volume examines the evolving role of language, regional expertise, and cultural competency (LREC) in U.S. military training, strategy, and leadership. Drawing on insights from both military and academic contributors, this collection offers a timely and authoritative overview of how LREC competencies support deterrence, interoperability, influence operations, and alliance-building for the warfighter.

Read more posts about foreign cultures HERE.

Read more posts about language learning HERE.

Read more posts about leadership HERE.

Read more military posts HERE.

Read more LREC posts HERE.

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