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Showing posts with the label self-esteem

Daily Excerpt: A Woman's Guide to Self-Nurturing (Romer): The Road to Self-Esteem

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  From A Woman's Guide to Self-Nurturing The Road to Self-Esteem What brings you happiness? Is it love? Is it meaningful work? Does a passionate interest meet that yearning that just has to be fulfilled? Chances are all of these needs are important, but there may be one hidden desire that never gets the attention it deserves. That need is self-esteem, the quiet, undemanding hankering to feel good about oneself. Certainly doing well in a job can bring self-esteem, but it may not be the kind we need, or it doesn’t last long enough before the next goal is put into place and we’re off again. Love comes closer, but again it has to be the right kind of love. Women’s love, as we know, is often focused outward, and that’s good—but for a true gain in self-esteem, women need to give love to themselves. This is not being selfish, it’s just being fair. We need to cherish ourselves in every way we can, if only so that our cup will be full enough to continue helping others. The Parable of the Te

Excerpt from A Woman's Guide to Self-Nourishment (Romer): Nurturing Contentment

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  Book Excerpt: Nurturing Contentment What makes us happy? I just made a list, and on it, I placed such items as “writing on the beach,” “cooking something interesting,” and “having lunch with Karen.” There are 20 such items—I could certainly come up with more. Plunging a little deeper into my memory, I could add “making love with my husband, Jack” (the last time was in 2010, the year before he died on January 2, 2011.), “vacation in the Keys” (2009), and “camping in upstate New York” (2002). If I think about these things and why they made me happy, I can see that all of them concerned getting in touch with a certain radiance or connection to love, and not just a personal love, although I certainly felt that for my late husband (and still do). I feel love for my friend Karen, and for the beach, cooking, the Keys, and the land in South Kortright, New York, where Jack and I used to camp. (I confess the last few times were in a trailer, not a tent!) But the love I am speaking of goe

Excerpt from Life, Liberty & Covid (Ortman): "Self-Compassion"

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  excerpt from Life, Liberty, & Covid-19 SELF-COMPASSION When we blame others with such vehemence, it is a good indication of a hidden, unacknowledged self-blame. We used to say as kids, “It takes one to know one.” Another way of saying it, “If you spot it, you got it.” That is called projection, as we discussed regarding prejudice. What we hate in others is what we cannot tolerate in ourselves but disown. We get rid of what we despise in ourselves by casting it onto others and then berate them for it. There is only one way to escape the blame game. Beginning with ourselves, we give up the harsh self-judgment. The first step in self-compassion, forgiveness, is to become attuned to our own suffering, which has several aspects: Losses During the pandemic, we suffer so many unavoidable losses. Our lives have been turned upside down. Most tragically, family members may have become infected and died. We could not be by their sides during their sufferings because of the quaranti

Excerpt from A Woman's Guide to Self-Nourishment (Romer): Self-Nurturing or Entertainnment?

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  Book excerpt: Self-Nurturing or Entertainment We all like to be entertained. The trouble is, sometimes entertainment isn’t as satisfying as we think it should be. The reason for this is because, instead of nurturing us in some way, the entertainment drains us, even makes us feel bad about ourselves. What kind of entertainment does this, and how can we avoid it? A little bit of forethought will usually do the trick. Take movies for example: perhaps we are assiduous in our efforts to avoid violence in films—we just don’t like it. But many of the movies out today contain violence, whether we like it or not. (This was explained clearly on the PBS special “Makers”: most movies, it seems are geared for men, and men, according to this special, like to see something being blown up or somebody getting shot.) So suppose you’re going to a movie with a man—husband, brother, male friend—and he is gravitating toward a really violent flick, while you’d like to see something like “The 100 Foot J

For All Women on Mother's Day: A Book on Self-Nourishing and Self

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Joanna's books are beloved by her fans. This book is no different. Read more about the book HERE . Read more posts about Joanna and her books, excluding excerpts HERE .