MSI Press Blog

Joshua Shea, author of MSI published book, He's a Porn Addict...Now What? seemingly had it all. A loving wife, two children, and a supportive extended family. In 2010, after nearly fifteen years working of his way up the journalism ladder, he launched a lifestyle magazine in his hometown. Within a year, he was one of the founders of Central Maine’s largest film festival and had won a seat on the City Council in Auburn, Maine. Accolades, including receiving the Key to the City and being called one of the “Next 10 People Shaping Maine’s Economy” by a state newspaper followed. While the public got one picture of Joshua, behind closed doors, his longtime mental health and addiction issues were festering. A workaholic by nature, he actively ignored the red flags surrounding his long-existing pornography and alcohol problems. Finding it easier to lose himself in a bottle of tequila and adult websites, his relationships with his family, colleagues, and f

My First Questions How do I know if he’s actually an addict? Tony, the mental health professional When a client comes into my office to talk about her partner who she thinks is an addict, she’ll usually begin to list all the reasons she’s sure he’s addicted to pornography. Then she’ll ask me the question, “How do I really know?” At this point, I recognize she’s doubting herself and questioning her intuition. This usually happens for one of two reasons: either she thinks she’s not qualified to make that diagnosis or, most commonly, she doesn’t want it to be true. I’ll hear the client’s entire monologue about her partner’s behavior, a behavior that led her to my office in the first place, only to hear her say, “But I’m probably wrong.” What she’s really thinking is ‘Please tell me I’m wrong.’ Chances are, she’s not wrong, but there is help, and there is hope. There are countless definitions of addiction, each with its own little nuances, but for the work I do, I l

Released today! And already #1 in the sexual health recovery category on Amazon. Find the book in the webstore here or online at nearly any retailer (or check your local library/bookstore -- and if not there, ask that the book be ordered). Book description: Admitting you're a drug addict or alcoholic can be difficult, but when it comes to pornography addiction, the pain of betrayal can hit the addict's partner worse than the addict himself. Difficult questions come rushing: Does he look at this stuff because I'm not enough? Was he like this when I first met him? Is this God trying to test me? What kind of help is available for him? Am I just supposed to stay here and deal with this? With  He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions , you'll get pertinent answers from both sides of the equation: from a therapist and from a former pornography addict. About the authors: Tony Overbay is a licen

  How do I know if he’s actually an addict?   Tony, the mental health professional   To be clear, until recently, there wasn’t anything in either the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) or the World Health Organization’s (WHO) International Classification of Diseases (ICD) that talked about sexual addiction or pornography addiction. Recently, the WHO updated the ICD to include Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder (CSBD) as a mental health condition. While this designation doesn't exactly meet the standard for addiction, it is definitely the strongest statement made by a body of experts in the field of sexual mental health.   Let me share a very 30,000-foot view of what is happening to the brain when viewing pornography.  When a man watches porn, his brain releases the feel-good drug, dopamine. There is some fascinating research around what is called “The Coolidge Effect.” The idea is that a male will mate with

  excerpt from He's a Porn Addict...Now What? (Overbay and Shea) -  Can a guy really look at pictures and images without comparing them to the person he is with?   Tony, the mental health professional:  I know from working with enough addicts that the typical reason someone is addicted to pornography is that it’s a coping mechanism for the parts of their life that they aren't satisfied with and it becomes an addiction they turn to again and again despite the isolation and shame. The pictures in the magazines and the images that they're watching in the videos are an unhealthy escape. But unfortunately, even when they aren’t isolated and are with their wives, they are still preoccupied with the fantasy imagery. A lot of the clients I work with admit they think of pornography when they are intimate with their wives. For young men, the growing rates of erectile dysfunction because of pornography is staggering. They are now growing up with such an unhealthy diet of porn and pic

   Tony Overbay and Joshua Shea, authors of the popular He's a Porn Addict...Now What? , teamed up, for the 200th podcast of the Virtual Couch, with Joshua, as host, interviewing Tony. It is a great interview!! Check out the Virtual Couch podcast HERE ! Or listen to audio only HERE . And take a look at their great book! Details HERE . From review by Mental Health @ Hom e: The authors aren’t here to judge partner or addict; their goal is to help both find healing, and as such, I believe it makes an important contribution to the field. From review by Goodreads : With He’s a Porn Addict…Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions, you’ll get pertinent answers from both sides of the equation. Tony Overbay is a licensed marriage and family therapist who has worked with thousands of couples dealing with pornography addiction. Also host of the popular The Virtual Couch podcast, Tony tackles your questions from the expert side of things. Joshua Shea, a

  from   He's a Porn Addict...Now What? Should I make him tell our pastor? Tony, the mental health professional: Remembering that ultimately you can’t “make” him do anything, I feel that it is reasonable to ask him to confess to your pastor, especially if he has truly been living a “double life” with regard to the addiction. Many addicts attend church regularly, which can confuse a spouse. “How can he worship God, or teach a Sunday School class, or hold any type of church responsibility and be acting out?” These are hard questions to process for the betrayed, but to the betrayer, this has been part of the shame cycle that often keeps an addict turning back to the addiction. Many addicts tell me that when they are in church, they are trying to be “all in.” They often say that they truly do compartmentalize areas of their lives, and when it comes to church, they often desperately cling to the hope that while they are in their “spiritual compartment” they will feel some hope. Often th

Released this week: https://msipress.com/book_titles/porn-and-the-pandemic-an-unseen-long-term-effect-of-covid-19/ Porn and the Pandemic: How Three Months in 2020 Changed Everything by Joshua Shea, author of https://msipress.com/book_titles/hes-a-porn-addict-now-what-an-expert-and-a-former-addict-answer-your-questions/ He's a Porn Addict...Now What? Read more posts by and about Joshua Shea and his works HERE .

  Introduction This book is a unique collaboration between a mental health professional, Tony Overbay, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Joshua Shea, a former journalist who spent more than two decades struggling with pornography addiction. Usually, the expert sitting in the chair and the person on the couch getting the help don’t work together on a project outside of the therapist’s office, but we think this is a natural match. (And for those wondering, Josh was never Tony’s client—they met on a podcast.) Tony spends dozens of hours every week working with couples who are at various stages of the therapy process. Many of these couples have struggled with pornography issues. Although you’re probably feeling alone in the world right now, you are not. Tony has dealt with women, men and couples who are going through exactly what you are experiencing. Josh was a pillar of his community when his world came crashing down. A magazine publisher and city councilor, his life cha

  Oops! We missed it, but it is still worth a listen. For sure! Check out " Another Look at Porn Addiction " with Deb Silber and MSI Press author, Joshua Shea ( He's a Porn Addict...Now What? and Porn and the Pandemic ) on Breakthrough from the PBT Institute. Joshua is a sought-after podcast interviewee. In the next week or so, for those who have enjoyed this podcast, we will post a list of a number of Josh's other podcasts for your listening entertainmanet and erudition. Read posts about Joshua and his books HERE . Link fo review of He's a Porn Addict...Now What? and more book information HERE .                                  Sign up for the MSI Press LLC newsletter                           Follow MSI Press on  Twitter ,  Face Book , and  Instagram .