MSI Press Blog

  from Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over Forty (Romer) The Break-U p   “I want a divorce.” If you cringe when you read these words, chances are you’ve heard them yourself. Or maybe you’ve uttered them—initiating a divorce is almost as bad as being the victim of one. Well, not quite. Having been in both situations, I can attest that it is far more painful to be the one who is left. Feeling lost, betrayed or abandoned is a typical reaction for the marriage partner who has been told that he or she is no longer necessary for whatever reason.  We cry, we sulk, we wonder what we did wrong. Often there is confusion and unanswered questions—is he really leaving today ? Is there another woman (or man), or isn’t there? That person whom we thought we knew, the one who is now in the process of walking out the door, isn’t telling us everything because—well, the truth hurts. At this difficult juncture, our soon-to-be ex-spouse may be trying to spare our feelings by leaving a smidgeon of

  Joanna Charnas was interviewed about the topic of divorce by Authority Magazine recently. You can read the interview HERE Joanna is author of four books: Read more posts by and about Joanna and her books HERE .

With time to be filled while locked away in quarantine, self-isolation, or sheltering in place. memoirs can become delightful reading material -- escaping into other worlds, experiencing other lives. Here is one of our favorites: Tucker and Me by Andrew Harvey: INTRODUCTION   My first memory involves being slapped in the face. I think psychologists put some measure of meaning into your first conscious remembrance. When people who know me read about this first memory, they are probably going to say, “Okay, now that explains a lot.” Well, I can’t blame them for that because in many ways I feel the same. I had just finished my lunch and was watching Sheriff John, a local Los Angeles daytime TV show for kids. I’m guessing I was only a few years old at the time because I remember still sleeping in somewhat of a crib contraption. Sheriff John was not an actual law enforcement official, but he wore a uniform that looked real to me and worked in an office that seemed pretty legitimat

                            ELAINE LANGLEY                                     “Don’t   let a man make you unhappy.”                                Elaine Langley is a slender, graceful woman with long flowing brown hair and a model’s face. She admits to doing some modeling before her first marriage (she’s had two), which ended in divorce in the late 1970s. "The No-Fault divorce changed things,” Elaine told me, in discussing her first divorce. “You didn’t have to claim someone was having an affair and ruin their reputation.”      Elaine said the whole process was easy, because it was her choice. “I paid $150 to get the divorce. Ben didn’t fight me. I wasn’t upset.” She explained that her husband Ben had broken her trust in him after only two years of marriage. “We had moved out to Wyoming so he could go to law school. Just a few weeks after we got there he said, ‘I don’t want to be one of these idiots. Let’s go back home.’” Elaine was shocked, but s

From Divorced!  by Joanna Romer Don’t Let Your Ex Make You Miserable! While many divorced people want to discuss with their ex “what went wrong” with their marriage, you may find yourself coming to dread such conversations. Going through my second divorce, I told my therapist, “I feel awful after I talk with him, and I don’t know why!” The therapist’s reply: “So, don’t talk to him.” “What do you mean?” I asked. “I have to talk to him—“ “Why?” he interrupted. “You’ve got a lawyer. Everything’s pretty   much hashed out anyway.  So, don’t call him.” I was doubtful. “What if he calls me?” “Don’t answer.” Even though it seemed initially like the cowardly way of handling things, I soon found that I felt much better without the bi-weekly conversation with my ex, where we’d been trying to discuss our differences. After two weeks of not talking to him at all, I was noticeably more cheerful. As my therapist said, everything important had already been work

Paige Lovitt for Reader Views says: On the cover, “Divorced!” by Joanna Romer states that it has survival techniques for “Singles over Forty.” As someone who was divorced at 35, I think that this would have been a great resource for me to have even at that age. Each chapter is written by a man or a woman that has survived divorce. Their stories reflect the topic being covered, which can range from the actual divorce, recovery, reclaiming yourself, to starting over and your new life. There are a lot of incredibly valuable stories shared in the 130 pages of text contained in this book. I found each story to be valuable, if not for me, for a friend who is going through divorce as I write. There are meaningful guidelines offered to help remind the reader about what steps they can take for healing and moving on with their life. There is a definite emphasis on relying on your faith to get you through the darkness. For many readers, this will be comforting. If you are getting di

INTRODUCTION  You’re recently divorced, and you’re having a little trouble handling it all. It’s bad enough that you’re alone and feeling almost worthless, but you can’t stop wondering what you did wrong to make your world come crashing down. How did this happen? More to the point, how did this happen to you? You’re not alone. Since the mid-1970s, the divorce rate in this country has hovered around a surprising 50% for first-time marriages. For second marriages the figure is even higher; about 60% of these end up in divorce court. While television shows and magazine articles usually focus on the court battles during divorce, the real trauma often takes place after the papers are signed, when the newly divorced person faces life alone. These singles must carry on their daily lives despite battered egos, diminished bank accounts and sometimes even the loss of friends who have “taken sides” in the battle. As a twice-divorced woman, I know about these issues and the toll they t

Divorced! Survival Techniques for Singles over 40  shares the stories of men and women just like you who have gone through the trauma of divorce, and now feel comfortable talking about it. Turning to God, to friends, family and even therapy, these adults were able to pull their lives back together again. Whether your divorce was recent or years ago, the guidelines in this book will help you put heartache aside and begin a new and fulfilling life. Read more posts about Joanna Romer and her many books HERE .