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Showing posts with the label Hain Omer

Children's Fears: The Secret of Parental Space (shared by Dr. Haim Omer)

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From "Children's Fears" --  Their bed, room, ears, body, time and leisure are not their own, but are often invaded by the child’s anxious reactions. A series of studies by Eli Lebowitz on our approach to parents of anxious children showed that when parents learn to restore and protect their personal boundaries, the child’s anxiety and distress diminish significantly. And what is not less important: The parents’ distress diminishes as well! We all know that when the baby is born, the mother’s availability is virtually unlimited. Probably many babies “would like” to perpetuate this situation. Thus they protest loudly when the mother becomes gradually less available. Fortunately, mothers have needs of their own, reducing their readiness to service the baby unlimitedly. The renowned psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott coined the expression “good enough mother” to stress that mothers do not need to be perfect. On the contrary! If they were perfectly attuned and always sensitive to...

Whose House Is This? (guest post by Dr. Haim Omer)

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Most children are naturally possessive and territorial. Shouts of "Don't touch my things!" "It's my money!" "Get out of my room!" are part of the daily soundtrack in many families. As the child grows, he has to learn that there are acceptable and unacceptable ways of clinging to what's his own. For instance, he has to learn that others also have a right to their property. He has to learn how to share. And he has to learn not to use his things in damaging ways. Many parents come to us because their children (whatever their age – the oldest "child" whose parents we treated was 62!) abuse their computer, their room and their money. Read the rest of the post HERE . Dr. Omer is the author of Courageous Parents .