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What is emotional intelligence?

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  Emotional intelligence is often described as the ability to understand and manage emotions, but that definition barely scratches the surface. Emotional intelligence is not simply being nice, agreeable, or sensitive. Rather, it is the capacity to recognize what we are feeling, understand why we are feeling it, and respond in ways that strengthen rather than damage our relationships with ourselves and others. At its heart, emotional intelligence begins with self-awareness. Emotionally intelligent people notice their emotions rather than being controlled by them. They can distinguish between frustration and anger, disappointment and grief, anxiety and excitement. Instead of reacting automatically, they pause long enough to understand what is happening inside them. This awareness allows them to choose their responses rather than becoming prisoners of impulse. Emotional intelligence also involves self-regulation. Everyone experiences anger, fear, jealousy, embarrassment, and disappoin...