Daily Excerpt: The Widower's Guide to a New Life (Romer) - Learning to Be Alone

 



Excerpt from The Widower's Guide to a New Life by Joanna Romer -

INTRODUCTION

Learning to Be Alone

When we lose a loved one—a friend or relative—our first reaction after the pain is usually atavistic: how will this affect me? When we lose a spouse, however, no such reaction is possible. The grieving widower or widow soon becomes aware that this loss is catastrophic in a different way: it’s more like losing a part of oneself, one’s arms or legs. We keep waiting for that dear one to reappear, we want to claim her or him—until we realize this isn’t going to happen. We’re alone. Not only are we in pain but also we’re alone.

For the widower, in particular, this can be quite a shock. Accustomed to having a “right hand” or equal partner always around, the newly bereaved man can be thrown into confusion. He has not realized his level of co-dependency. Suddenly, he’s facing life without his spouse in a thousand different ways, and he is devastated.

What can you do when your beloved wife dies? As one of the widowers in this book stated, acceptance is the key factor. You have to accept the reality that your spouse is gone and that you must continue your life’s journey without her. Nothing can bring your dear wife back, but there are ways to comfort yourself. Other men have figured it out, and so can you. From learning how to live by yourself successfully to deciding to remarry, there are numerous paths you can take to rebuild your life. The men interviewed in this book have shared their stories in the hope that what they’ve gone through will help you, the new widower, cope with your loss.

God bless you as you put the pieces of your life back together!

 For more posts about Joanna and her books, click HERE. 

For more book excerpts, click HERE.

This book was a finalist for the Book of the Year Award.

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